The Up-Close-and-Personal-Website Project

2006-07-11T15:17:00.000+08:00

I have been busy lately being duped by heartless "clients"/ I have been busy lately actively practicing my stupidity, so, I didn't have much time for much deep thought and couldn't deliver so much as intended.
Anyhows, I have an inkling to create a personal information website seperate to my professional one. Why I would bother to broadcast to the world anything and everything about me, I don't exactly know. Perhaps as an affirmation of my own existence... perhaps I still feel that I am not really here.
After making my business plan (as I need money to pursue a higher education) I will make these two seperate entities. My business site and my personal site.
Whether or not I'd be linking the two, I am still undecided. I have this feeling I don't want prospects to know very intimate information about me... but there is a chance it might help...

Genesis

2006-06-11T15:46:00.000+08:00

It sounds cliche but LIFE BEGINS AT THIRTY. I don't know if it's in the sudden change in digits-- that once, your tens were in its 20s and the ones in its 9; Moments before, I was running to a nuclear shelter gasping for breath, hallucinating in lethal concoctions of mediocrity and cynicism; in a few seconds, the planet shifts, polar icecap melts to reveal Atlantis in its naked glory. Or perhaps that obviously Saturn won't be bothering me again for another 26 years hoping that by then I would have actually achieved something.
It was at this moment that I have decided to actively pursue what I have always intended but feared to do, to be an ART THERAPIST and take the rightful steps to get there. First, I created this blog to chronicle my progress and prove to myself my seriousness and tenacity in this pursuit. Hopefully, it may attract people who can give support and sound advise.
Why Art Therapy? Why the hell not? I have always felt a sense of dread about the usual thing that I do. "So this pays the bills... and then what?" I've always felt that I should be using what I know and can do to uplift someone's life, make the world a tad better place to live in. A friend once told me, we don't pursue what we want because we are afraid to leave our comfort zones. That and the fact that I felt unworthy of helping others when in fact my psyche is in such bad shape, I am the one who needs the help desperately. But somebody else assured me, that those who have been messed up make better counselors for they know first hand what patients have go through (as Christ descended into hell before ascending into heaven and start saving souls or something like that). And so the journey begins not only for the pursuit of a career but my personal soul healing as well.
The name "LAPSIT EX CAELIS" I found in Holy Blood Holy Grail. The Legend has had different versions one of which was Wolfram von Eschenbach's "Parzival" wherein the knight's hermit uncle expunds on the Grail.

"...It is called Lapsit Excillis. By the powers of that stone the phoenix burns
to ashes, but the ashes give him life again... . "

Scholars have had theories of the origins of the name: Lapis Ex Caelis, "stone from the heavens"; Lapsit Ex Caelis, "it fell from the heavens"; Lapis Lapsus ex Caelus, "a stone fallen from heaven"; even Lapis Ellixir, Nicolas Flamel's mythical Philosopher Stone of Alchemy. I think referencing mystical stones is pushing it a little bit too much. Besides, time-warped hippies and psychedelics might give it a more colorful explanation. ( I can imagine Irene Curtis singing Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit") Falling from the Heavens is within the theme of the blog, "spelunking down the consciousness..." As a spelunker is a newbie cave enthusiast so am I as I dwell into my subconscious.
Why would I even bother dwelling into my subconscious? Why the hell not? They say, the mind is like an iceberg, only 10% is in the surface. Below the surface is a mine of undiscovered potential or may even peril... who knows? What I know is as long as you don't know the entirety of your being, you really don't know yourself. Temet Noste. That is the sign on top the doorway at Oracle's Lair. It means "Know Thyself."